When you practice forgiveness for any money mistake you made that caused guilt and shame, you clear the way to manifest money.
Recently I was a guest on a podcast where I talked about one of the biggest “money mistakes” I made in my business.
I’ve taught women about money for 10 years. What I know for sure is this:
Everyone has a story of money shame.
After I was interviewed, I began to think more about this experience.
I realized that I have never forgiven myself for losing $96k in my PR business!
The year was 2001. I was at the top of my game in my PR business. I had a team of five people working with me on contract doing PR for healthcare technology software clients.
My business was grossing multiple six-figures. My PR company represented three start-up technology companies to the news media and industry analysts.
One of my clients, a software start-up company, hired us to work on a trade show plus help them gain national media. We put in a lot of time over a three-month period to help launch their new product.
I’d worked with this particular company for two years. At the time we started working more hours for them, they began to delay paying us. Because I’d never had problems getting paid from any of my clients, I let it go.
One of my key team members started noticing other areas of disrespect in their email communication.
I didn’t listen. I was focused on doing the work.
I didn’t honor my own boundaries for how I wanted to be treated.
Then I received a check for the first of the three months we worked for them.
A few weeks after the check arrived, so did a letter from their attorney announcing that this company was declaring bankruptcy.
This letter said that I had to send back the $19,000 check they had just paid us. This is standard in certain types of bankruptcy proceedings because the venture capitalists are in first position to recoup any money.
Sending back the $19,000 was painful – very painful.
I had to pay my team for their time and expenses for the three months they worked on behalf of this company, which totaled $45k.
Here’s how I dealt with this:
I focused on going forward and I decided I would NOT let this stop me.
After all I was living my dream.
I attribute my positive attitude for what happened next.
About one month later, I got a call from my former client at Microsoft Healthcare asking me if I would contract to do their PR and analyst relations again.
I said yes, and I worked with them for the next two years.
I never missed a beat in my business.
This was a lesson that I learned and it would NEVER happen again.
Today I practice forgiveness routinely so that I clean up my life. I learn from my mistakes. I don’t hold onto them as evidence (proof) that I’m not good enough. Whatever experience I’ve had was a lesson for me.
Why you want to forgive yourself
When you forgive yourself, you release the potential of playing the scene (that story) over and over again in your mind.
Forgive anyone and everyone that you hold a grudge with.
When you hold a grudge against yourself or someone else this is a way of blocking money or what you most want.
Self judgment or self-blame keeps you living in a story that is focused on lack and limitations.
You live out the story you tell or believe. When you forgive yourself and stop reliving or repeating a negative story – you open yourself up to the unlimited opportunities you have before you.
One thing I know about my behavior is that I do not dwell on mistakes. I charge ahead and don’t ruminate about it.
Learn from your mistakes
When you make a mistake, realize that it wasn’t a mistake. The reality is that it happened. Byron Katie says that you’re arguing with reality if you talk about “what should have happened,” because it happened.
I needed to learn this expensive lesson, because I had this experience.
Shame and guilt have some of the lowest frequencies of energy.
Abraham Hicks book, Ask and It Is Given, talks about energy and the frequencies of emotions. Notice that guilt (shame) and fear are the most dense emotions that have the lowest vibration.
The tone you emit is how the Universe responds.
To clear out this experience, I forgave myself because I didn’t want to hold on to any story that causes me to feel bad or ashamed.
The tone you emit is how the Universe responds.
“Practicing forgiveness means letting go of self-righteous anger, blame, and resentment. That’s hard. The combination of self-righteous anger, blame, and resentment is one of my favorites … Unfortunately, I think it’s toxic and eats you alive from the inside. It might go down like a milkshake, but it burns up your insides like battery acid.”
~ Brené Brown
How to forgive your money mistakes:
Here’s how I practiced self-forgiveness:
- I wrote down two things I wanted to forgive myself for around money. One was when I was four years old and took candy from a store. This was a traumatic experience because my mother had me go back and apologize. The second experience was for not having firm boundaries around payments and how I wanted to be treated with respect.
2. I read it out loud and said I forgive myself for making these money mistakes.
3. Then I put the paper in a bowl and burned it. I said I now release that experience.
4. Then I made a strong declaration. I put my right hand over my heart and said, “I am a good steward of my money. Universe bring me more money.”
5. I used the emotional freedom technique to tap out the money shame. Check out this video below and try it. You follow what Brad says and tap on the same points that he taps.
If you liked this post, please share it. Do you have money shame and have you forgiven yourself?