A Permission Slip for You to Be Free

A Permission Slip to Be Free

I want you to live in a world where you no longer hide and make excuses for why you can’t do what you want to do with your life or business.

I want to help you stop waiting for your future and cut out the middleman and live fully now.

First I want to tell you a story about how I saved two years of my life when I believed that I was not “ready” for a particular job. I dreamed of getting a job as a PR director at one of the hospitals in my town in Oregon.  However, I was phobic (paralyzing fear) about writing.  This was not going to stop me from getting the job I wanted.  So I decided that I would take two years to go to school and learn writing techniques.

I went to a community college and the first thing I did was to hire a grammar tutor.  Then when I finished with that tutor, I enrolled in the University of Oregon’s Journalism School – all while I was a single mom and working full-time.  Then a friend called and said that one of the hospital’s had a PR job open and it would be perfect for me.  I had seen that job opening a month prior and thought I wasn’t ready.  This time I decided to go ahead and apply.  I had my interview and imagine my surprise when I was offered the job right on the spot!  I left that interview knowing that I saved two years of my life getting that job.

Was I ready for that job?  Not entirely.  Would I learn as I went?  Absolutely and I would do whatever it took to do a great job. Did I feel like a fraud and would be found out?  Of course I felt that but I didn’t let it stop me.  I systematically decided to become great at doing the one thing in the job (besides writing) that caused me a lot of anxiety — media relations.  So I focused on what I feared most and made it my strength.  I learned everything I could about media relations and mastered it.  Then later this strength/skill is what helped me create a multi-six figure PR business and represent Microsoft’s Healthcare Vertical group.

Your thinking is either keeping you in prison or it’s setting you free.

If a thought doesn’t set you free, it’s not true.  Truth always leads to freedom.

Often the truth goes against what we’ve been taught in life.

Many of the values we hold are simply not true.  They are values we have been conditioned to believe by our parents, schools, media, culture or religions institutions.  I love the bumper sticker that says “Question Authority.”  Question what you believe.

I want you to stop using fear as an excuse to hold back from living your dream.

Fear is actually a signal – the greater the fear of moving forward – the more likely it’s on your path.

I want you to practice small acts of courage every day.  Your comfort zone is only a zone in your mind that needs to be expanded.  Drive a new way home, and start acting on those wild ideas.  Do one thing each month that is new to you.  Follow what feels good.

I want you to wake up and show up in your life.  Stop being late.  Stop making up lame excuses for why you can’t.  Start saying yes to life as often as you can.  A Woody Allen quote says: “Eighty percent of life is just showing up.”

When you hide behind politeness and people pleasing behaviors, you are leaving me wanting and missing the real you.  The only person to please is you.  When we’re not pleasing other people, we begin to understand what’s right for us.”  Byron Katie

You are holding back from fear of being seen and are terrified of criticism. 

You are worried about what we think of you when it never matters what we think. It only matters what you think.

You are playing it safe and that puts you in prison.  Your freedom is actually in practicing small acts of courage. 

I want you to become aware of the judge’s voice in your mind.  Discernment is the way out of your mental prison.  Observe your thoughts and when you hear your inner judge, ask it to sit and have tea.  Don’t resist the voice, welcome it in yet don’t listen to what it says.

The judge or inner critic’s voice says things like this:

Who do you think you are to do that?

You are not good enough to do that.

You don’t know enough to do that.

You can’t do ___________ until you have done _______________.

You can’t do ______________until you lose 10 pounds.

You will never be good enough to do that. 

You don’t have enough time to do that.

You need more training to do _______________,

I want to liberate you from the prison of your mind and have you get to know your courtroom of inner judges.  When you begin to discern the voices in your head (we all have inner critics) and notice the negative Nellies, stop, breathe and don’t listen to what it says.  They were formed to protect you from shame, vulnerability and humiliation.  Your inner critic usually makes a statement that doesn’t allow for any possibility.  It shuts down the potential action you might take.

Your inner critic will hold you back and keep you from playing full out in your life.  Make sure to observe the negative voices, breathe, don’t listen or follow their directive.  When you are in a “mind trance” and can’t notice what you are thinking, you attach to your thoughts as if they are true and that will drive your behavior and give you a result = stuckness, overwhelm, procrastination, fear, self-doubt and sadness.  Ask your inner critic to sit down for tea, so you can move forward doing what you want to do.   Don’t resist them or they will persist.

Note that the voices get louder when you are starting a new venture – in business or life.  A time of change brings the inner critics out to play.

When you are stuck and can’t make a decision or move forward, always notice what you are thinking about.  If you hear – “who are you to _______” counter it with, “I will research this business idea and find all that I can about it” because I know that information is power.  Your inner critic wants you stop and not move forward.  I want you to move forward anyway – this is how to overcome stuckness.

When you move into a mind-set of problem solving and ask yourself, what do I need to learn, be or do in order to do that?  Who can I talk to so that I can learn more about this field?  What is the first step you need to take?. It’s one thing to become aware. Transformation only comes from taking action.

As always, I’d love to hear your comments below.  Or if you found this useful, please pass it on.

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    1. Michelle – thank you so much for reading this. I wanted it to feel like it was written to each person who read it. Big hug.

    1. Hi Jackie – thanks for reading this. If we ask for what we want and learning to face rejection straight up – we will learn that asking gets us what we want;)

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